Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
Blogs > MinasDaddy > Whatever you do... |
strain Unless you are incredibly new to this blog, you know that I don’t sugar coat the life and love Mina and I are sharing and experiencing together. What I put here is real, true, raw. When there is something to celebrate, we’re happy to tell you all about it, but I don’t shy away from the truth when things aren’t going so well either. When I / we fail or falter, I put that here as well. Mistakes made are not kept secret, they are revealed with the hope that you will see my and I are as authentic as we claim to be. I can’t really explain why that is important to me; to be believed, or to at least not be thought of as a liar. That must be something from my past. This blog: these words, pictures, thoughts, revelations may wind up being the only sign that I ever existed on this planet. That notion had been haunting me lately, but I finally got my mind and heart to shift to the idea that I will not be remembered by anyone except, perhaps, my . I could live out the rest of my life, and die a happy man, as long as I had the true love of just one person. Just one. Some might see that as putting a lot of pressure on my hija, and I think on some levels that may be true, but not where it counts. All I’m asking for, is loyalty and honesty, until the very end. If a person cannot promise and provide that, then I’d rather live and die alone. I know that Mina is loyal, and forgiving, and I believe she has the kindest heart I’ve ever encountered. I’ve loved her from almost the very first days we met, and that love has only grown and strengthened as time has passed. My commitment to her is genuine, and unstoppable, and my only truly selfish desire is that she never break my heart so badly we have to live separate lives again. If I can count on that for the rest of my life, I’d like very much to end my days with her by my side, and in my heart. Like most parents, I kind of hope I die on her before she dies on me. I don’t think, I KNOW, that I could not go on without my bug. She is my world. This is rambling and not focused because I am feeling emotional and a bit uneasy. The last couple of weeks have not been good to us, and the strain and stress is beginning to show. I am particularly guilty of losing my temper, and self control, numerous times. I’ve raised my voice, cursed, said awful things. I’ve blown things out of proportion, been unfair, and flat out wrong. My behavior has been embarrassing, and I am disappointed in myself. It turns out I’m not the super awesome guy I want to be all the time. It turns out I still need a lot of work. I am blessed to have captured the heart of a young lady who will, I firmly believe, be right by my side as I struggle to be the better Father, friend, lover that I want to be. Mine is a dedication at the highest levels, and I know my deserves that, and more. I will give her everything I am, and everything I have, and keep striving to be and do better. There is stress and strain right now, but it cannot, and will not last. |
Become a member to comment on this blog | ||
×
×